How Old ARE You?

Two weeks ago, I turned 62.  That seems like a rather astonishing thing to me.  I mean, I know that it's not like turning 100 years old, but on a personal level, I have never actually known a 100-year-old person.  I did get close, as The Tim's maternal grandmother was 99 years and 8 months old when she died.  But I didn't know her very well, though until the last two years or so of her life, she was involved in life, even if she wasn't physically active.

But I have now outlived my father by nine years, and my mother died when she was 69 years old, so it's kinda weird to realize that.  I do have a lot more aches and pains, and I move more slowly than I used to (though no one would have ever really called me "quick"), and God knows I have a ton more health issues than ever before.  But I've been thinking about getting older, and I realized the other day that although I *know* how old I am, I don't always feel like an older person.  And I'm guessing that in this day and age, that's the case for a lot of people.

I think an awful lot of it has to do with the shift in our culture.  Yes, I realize that in some ways - advertising,  products, TV, etc. - it's all about young people.  I'm guessing that to some extent that has always been the case, it's just not been so prevalent, because in the past life was lived at a slower pace.  But I can remember when I was growing up, that people in a lot of way just looked older at a certain point, and I think they were expected to act that way as well.  I remember when I was ten years old, one of my cousins got married.  She was in her mid-twenties (you know, an "old maid"!), and she had always been a really pretty woman.  But after her marriage, the person who used to wear her hair down or in a ponytail, and wear shorts in the summer or two-piece swimsuits, suddenly turned into a matronly-looking married person.  She always wore her hair pulled back into a bun, and stopped wearing shorts altogether, opting for a shift dress or occasionally, slacks.  When I'd see her at the local park's swimming pool, she would always be wearing a black one-piece swimsuit, and unless she was actually in the pool, she wore a long coverup.  All of a sudden, she looked a whole lot older.  I can recall pointing this out to my mother, and her responding, "Well, she thinks she needs to look married now."

A puzzling statement to me, since my mother was married, and she dressed "normally," meaning that she was clearly older, but didn't dress like she was a matron.  Granted, there were times when my sister Nancy (who was the only one who knew how to sew at the time - we all later learned in self-defense) would hem a dress or sweater for her, turning it into a mini-skirt, and she wouldn't wear it, because she didn't want to "look like a goddamn fool," but for the most part, my mother dressed a lot like people do today who wear clothes they like that fit well. 

And I think that's one of the reasons I've never associated age with looking/acting/dressing a certain way.  I will admit that I see people that in my opinion are trying just a bit too hard to look younger than they are, but a) it's none of my business, and b) if that makes them happy, go for it.  But I still enjoy most things I've always enjoyed.  I still wear the kind of clothes I've almost always liked to wear, and my tastes in music, TV, etc. are in line with that even if they are not exactly the same as before.

So how old am I?  In some places, I'm already a senior citizen ("Over 55") and can get a discount on a hotel room or a car rental.  A few of my contemporaries are already grandparents.  My co-workers think I am ancient, and keep asking me when I am going to retire (which sadly does not appear to be any time soon on the horizon).  I am automatically left out of some discussions or events because of my actual (sometimes perceived) age. 

The good news is, that since I have pretty much always been my own best company, I don't really care for the most part.  I'm an introvert, so I'm just as happy to not be invited to most events.  It does annoy me that I get left out of things at work sometimes, for no other reason than my age. 

I'm still me.  I am still often immature in my tastes, I am likely to find inappopriate things funny.  I am also a responsible person and have adult, more thought-out opinions, and certainly have the freedom to make my own decisions.

But how OLD am I?  Am I 62 years old?  Yes.  But to be honest with you, I have NO idea what that is suppose to mean.  I just keep hoping I have a lot more years left to keep trying to figure it all out.  ;-)